Aug 04, 2015


“The Four Agreements”: Don’t Take It Personally

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This week is Archived week.  In preparation for our FREE Renewal Challenge E-course, starting this January 15, we are re-publishing five of our top personal development articles to help you kick start your year and challenge yourself to create the life you deserve.  Stick with us for more excellent insights and resources to help you achieve a brilliant and empowered 2012!


A Lesson from The Four Agreements

Whatever happens around you don’t take it personally.  Using an earlier example, if I see you on the street and I say, “Hey, you are stupid,” without knowing you, it’s not about you; it’s about me.  If you take it personally, then perhaps you believe you are stupid.  Maybe you think to yourself, “How does he know?  Is he clairvoyant, or can everybody see how stupid I am?”

You take it personally because you agree with whatever was said.  As soon as you agree, the poison goes through you, and you are trapped in the dream of hell.  What causes you to be trapped is what we call personal importance. Personal importance, taking things personally, is the maximum expression of selfishness because we make the assumption that everything is about “me.”  During the period of our education, or our domestication, we learn to take everything personally.  We think we are responsible for everything.  Me, me, me and always me!

Nothing other people do is because of you.  It is because of themselves.  All people live in their own dream, in their own mind; they are in a completely different world from the one we live in.  When we take something personally, we make the assumption that they know what is in our world, and we try to impose our world on their world.

Even when a situation seems so personal, even if others insult you directly, it has nothing to do with you.  What they say, what they do, and the opinions they give  are according to the agreements they have in their own minds.  Their point of view comes from all the programming they received during domestication.

If someone gives you an opinion and says, “Hey, you look so fat,” don’t take it personally, because the truth is that this person is dealing with his or her own feelings, beliefs, and opinions.


Pages 47 to 49 from the book titled: The Four Agreementsby Don Miguel Ruiz.  Perhaps one of the best short books you will ever read to feel good about yourself instantaneously.


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Angélica Pérez-Litwin

Angélica Pérez-Litwin

Dr. Perez-Litwin is the Founder & CEO of ELLA Leadership Institute, a multi-platform professional development organization designed to advance the careers and leadership of women. She's the creative force behind the LATINAS THINK BIG™ national tour, sponsored and live-streamed by Google.

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  1. I just downloaded this book to my kindle. I can’t wait to read it. :)

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