Oct 31, 2014

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Stop Acting Like A “Real Housewife” and Stop Feeling Sorry for Yourself

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feeling sorry for yourself

If you watch The Real Housewives on Bravo TV, chances are you have seen episodes where these rich ladies complain about everything in their lives:  their workaholic husbands, their inept assistant, and the stress of having to pack their high end luggage for their next trip to Hawaii.

They whine, they yell and become all unraveled.  Fascinating to see how people can be financial wealthy but have a poor  mentality — the mindset of dis-empowerment and seeing the glass half empty.

Feeling Sorry for Yourself?  Get Over It

Time and time again, we create a melodrama out of our lives that really unfolds like a telenovela.  We use  labels in our lives to keep us down and allow them to define ALL of who we are:  “I was abused; I am poor; I’m a minority; I’m a victim; I’m a single mom; I’m going through a divorce; I’m unemployed.”

I’m here to yell at you tell you to:  STOP.

Stop feeling sorry for yourself and do something about your life.

If you don’t like your life — change it.

If your husband abuses you — leave him.

If you hate being obese – eat healthier and start moving.

If you’re depressed – get help.

If life has been unfair to you – create a new one.

Question Your Excuses

Have you ever stopped for a moment to question the reasons you give yourself for not moving forward with your life or your goals?  Why not?  That’s because we have been programmed to feel sorry for ourselves.  We’ve learned that we CAN’T, when indeed WE CAN.

Stop Being Lazy and Get Focused on What Really Matters

I understand that feeling sorry for yourself is much easier than working HARD on something you really want.

I know it is much easier to sit and watch TV for hours, than to go to school and get that degree you’ve been dreaming about.  [And don't give me that crap that you can't afford to go to college. At two-year colleges, the average price for tuition and fees is $2,963. Take some loans for goodness sake.]

Sometimes we need to face our truth.  Perhaps we’re just too comfortable in our sorry state.  Maybe we want things to land on our laps.  I’m here to remind you:  Nothing that’s good in life comes easy, free or cheap.  There is just no way around it.  It’s a simple formula:  You get out what you put in.  If you’re not willing to do what it takes to have you want, that’s a choice YOU are making.

So how are you going to transform?

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Angélica Pérez-Litwin

Angélica Pérez-Litwin

Dr. Perez-Litwin is the Founder & CEO of ELLA Leadership Institute, a multi-platform professional development organization designed to advance the careers and leadership of women. She's the creative force behind the LATINAS THINK BIG™ national tour, sponsored and live-streamed by Google.

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